DIE ANOTHER DAY
Today I'm perioding so much, like cramps upon cramps and I stayed up way too late last night watching TV and eating peanut butter cups. But, today is also First Friday and I'm excited to be hosting yet another event in Indianapolis. We're gonna have music, I spent all of Wednesday night hanging artwork alone in my office (which was oddly relaxing and cathartic), and once we have this client meeting, I'll be arranging the back room so it accommodates a nifty, big brother style confessional.
I really missed doing event planning. I'm excited that my office just hired someone who will be taking more on of the writing aspect of the job so I can spend time focused just on managing my events, booking classes, and taking part in Indianapolis' art and music scene. A talented friend said something last night that resonates with me: you know you're going to be working until the day you die so you might as well do something you love.
Well, I love throwing parties. Hopefully I can keep getting paid to do so.
The other day, I started trying to conceive of some goals beyond making do with life and living from paycheck to paycheck. I want to go backpacking with Susan. I want to get my bike in for a tune up. I want to visit Boston. I want to get to Spain and Canada to see my friends there. And eventually, I want to buy a house. When I calculated this out, I'll need about $800 more dollars per month. I'm hoping to get in and do more freelancing again to make up that difference but at this point I'm even willing to bar tend or serve.
You can't budget when you don't have enough money and you absolutely can't save. But, since I'm getting a handle on the aspects of my daily life, working on silks, reaching my flexibility goals (back bends and oversplits hip hip hooray!), drinking less, eating right, etc, I feel like I can take on the extra work to meet my bigger goals.
Last week, I had a boyfriend. For approximately two weeks. We'd been seeing each other consistently for about a month and a half and then it seemed like the next big step was dating officially but honestly it just didn't work for me. Like I wanted to be close to him and I craved the emotional intimacy of a relationship but this guy just couldn't seem to give that. The stakes of the relationship were too low for me to jeopardize my drive especially since I am totally one of those people that gets sidelined by a relationship. I put way too much into it and then I totally lose track of my goals. But, I realized something in dating K, I can find a person who's capable of supporting me and helping me along the way to my goals, as well as a person who lets me get close to them. When I told him this, he responded in a super self-actualized way. He acknowledged his mistakes and I really appreciated it. Who knows what's on the horizon for romance?
Right now, I just want to do back bends and oversplits and throw parties.